Puppy Love
by Daleksdoctor
Summary: The group stages an intervention for Alistair who feels like he is being bullied by Dog. Completely probable. Lots of light vibes and happy feelings :)


As usual, my night began with me jolting awake in a panic.

"GAH!"

Both eyes snapped open, but all I saw was darkness. Oh no. Was I hurt? Was I blind?

Was I _dead_?

No… wait. This all seemed familiar somehow. A beat passed, and I forced my trembling limbs to still.

Silence.

_Ah… so it was just another dream, then. As I thought._

A heavy breath passed through my lips and I could feel the ground below me absorb every indent of my body while it sagged in relief. How many times had this happened before? How many darkspawn dreams was I supposed to endure? How many times did I have to watch my friends die before me while being completely powerless?

When would it all _end_?

I couldn't help but scowl slightly at the thought. Ridiculous. After all, I just wanted to sleep! It wasn't like I was asking for the whole of Thedas to come together at a moment's notice for world peace, right?

"Alistair," I groaned angrily. "Are you awake?"

But there was no answer. When I finally rolled over on my side, I found his side of the tent empty save for a few crumpled up blankets resting where I would normally curl up and lay my head. My heart suddenly constricted as dim remnants of the previous nightmare washed over me in pointed ghosts, nipping and pecking at my tired frame. It was enough to bring back the trembles, and so I pushed back the sweaty hair from my elven face and steadily got to my feet, checking to make sure that Alistair's tunic wasn't bunched around my legs in an awkward manner.

_Guess he couldn't sleep either._

Carefully peeling the tent's opening out of my way, I stifled a yawn and stepped out into the summer's warm night, not surprised to find several members of our troop already gathered around a campfire and talking animatedly. I spotted Leliana first if only because of the light's shadows dancing across her crimson hair. She seemed to be in a heated discussion with Sten, who looked utterly bored as usual with both bulky arms folded over his chest. I almost giggled at the sight of them - didn't Sten _ever_ smile? They paid me no attention as I shuffled closer to where they had congregated, however, and my gaze shifted over towards the familiar curve of two broad shoulders only a few feet away from them.

It was no use - it was like I forgot how to breathe every single time my eyes laid upon his perfect face. He looked tired in the campfire's glow, though the lines creasing the skin underneath his eyelashes did nothing to distract me from his handsome demeanor. His body had already shifted towards mine by the time I had finished my approach, but his gaze followed shortly after, and I was surprised to see Morrigan sitting adjacent to him, with Sir, my mabari, on her other side.

"There you are," I sighed happily while coming to a stop in front of my three friends, "What are you all doing up so -"

"Lyna! Control your dog this instant!"

I stopped short at Alistair's interruption, mostly because of the tone of his voice. It was high-pitched and almost… _whiny_.

I swallowed carefully and looked down where my beloved Warden sat. "Why do I… what?"

"He's being mean to me!" Alistair grumbled, his usual god-like face all red and angry. I paused, still unsure of the situation, and finally sank onto the knee he had positioned out for me to perch on.

"Alistair, are you… _pouting_?"

The warmth of the campfire was nearly nonexistent in light of the circumstances, and I arched an eyebrow at him while he tried - and failed, to coherently form a response. It seemed no one was going to explain what was going on to me, and so I reluctantly turned to Morrigan, who rested comfortably with a smirk on her face and a dusty book in her grasp.

"Can you please tell me what the problem is?" I asked her curiously. "Should I be worried about _mutiny_ or something?"

If I was concerned before, I was soon terrified to witness Morrigan's smirk widened into a full-blown grin. She almost vibrated with a tangible sort of smugness, and I felt my own face pale in response at the prospect of a _happy_ Morrigan.

But, her voice remained the same, disinterested level it always did when she spoke. "I don't think we should fear the possibility of mutiny so much as our dear Alistair's ability to gauge what is reasonable and what is… well - the opposite."

"Even when you're not outwardly calling me names you _still_ sound like a massive bi—"

Alistair growled lowly when I slapped my palm over his mouth. Morrigan merely beamed.

"Morrigan, please," I asked seriously, "Just spit it out."

I said nothing as Alistair began licking my hand, though I was quick to yank it away from his face and wrap it around his neck for support as he leaned into me. Morrigan's smile faded slightly as Alistair clasped his hands tighter around my waist, and she brought a hand to her bangs, proceeding to run each finger through the loose strands.

"As you wish. Alistair is simply under the impression that Sir does not approve of your romantic relationship. 'Tis hardly surprising, at any rate. It was just a matter of time before our templar deferred to _every_ member of the group who expressed a higher level of intelligence than he."

I grinned, feeling my gaze involuntarily flicker to my massive mabari nearly situated on top of Morrigan's lap.

"Alistair?" I furthered without looking at him.

He sighed, angrily nuzzling his face into my neck then. "Well, of course it's going to sound ridiculous when you put it like _that_ but it's true! Ever since we… _you know_, Sir has been putting the most disgusting things in my pack! Wet things, rotting things… even _dead_ things sometimes! He never did that before! And you should just _see_ the looks he gives me when no one else is watching. I swear, he's going to eat me one of these days! Oh, Lyna… make no mistake. That damn dog has it out for me, I _know_ it. He's a _monster_."

"Sir is_ not _a monster," Morrigan purred sweetly while reaching down to ruffle his neck. "Sir a very resourceful creature, which is far more than _you_ can say for yourself. Aren't you, you clever boy?"

To be honest, I was just trying not to laugh at this point. What in the world was happening to these people? Alistair grumbled dejectedly, his hands and arms still fastened around my body that sat upon him. Sir was blinking sleepily at Morrigan who had started to scratch him affectionately around the ears, and I remained there, both astonished and dumbfounded at the entire situation.

Was _everybody_ going crazy tonight?

I leaned forward then, ignoring Alistair tugging at me possessively while I joined Morrigan in her very public and unusual display of affection for my mabari.

"Sir," I half-sang to his knowing face, "What do _you_ have to say for yourself, hm?" Sir growled happily in response and licked my hand a few times before nuzzling me the same way Alistair already had.

"I assumed that your clan would be disappointed to learn of our relationship due to my human heritage, but I _never_ in a million years would have imagined the same going for you and your _mutt_ as well. That's just on a whole new level of wrong."

I turned to see Alistair already smirking at me. "You _do_ know he can understand everything you're saying, right?"

"Oh, trust me. I know." He chuckled once before leaning in towards Sir. "Manipulation," Alistair pronounced slowly. "_There's_ a vocabulary word for you."

But Sir only blinked at him.

"Now you see, that's just twisted," Alistair scoffed. "A pet that can still lie to your face without even speaking a word. _That's_ what you want."

And that was it. That was when I lost my composure. I don't know how long I laughed for, but I was soon out of control, my breathing ragged and irregular as hot tears flooded down my cheeks. I couldn't even keep my eyes open to see how the rest of the party was reacting - _that_ was how hard the giggles came in, each one ripping through my stomach like a dull punch to the gut. It was the most genuine laugh I'd had in _ages_, and Alistair joined me shortly after my first outburst, with Morrigan jumping in a minute later.

"This is the most… _ridiculous_ thing I have ever heard of," I sputtered out in between heaving breaths. "You people are actually _insane_!"

But they only laughed harder. As our reckless cackling soon dissolved into the dry, warm twilight, I started to wonder. Maybe tonight wasn't a defeat after all. Maybe there _could_ be small victories amidst this terrible and treacherous war. Maybe… just maybe - tonight was one of them.

And I could live with that.


End file.
